Wednesday last week saw my wife and I attend the first of four ante-natal classes. Session 1 - "Heavy breathing". The two likeable and talkative mid-wives who have probably delivered more babies than devoured hot dinners were doing a spectacular and very amusing demonstration on how the mum-to-be should breathe as they near delivery. Think these ladies would be good contenders for a certain 0898 call centre. There were five other couples in the room listening intently to the mid-wives. It wasn't just a case of - they talk, we listen...but get interactive. Yikes...Daunting stuff! It was like a workshop affair where each person in the room was given a card with a familiar pregnancy scenario. You read it out, and discuss. Mine "Tightening every fifteen minutes" caused some amusing reaction from the blokes....
"That's what got my wife into this condition in the first place!...." (childish sniggers all round & high symbol required).
Another bloke held up his card...."My pants are wet". He was then promptly given directions to the toilet....So again, sniggers insued....The seemingly foreign language used to describe female bits were quite baffling. "I have a show" was on another card. I have a show....weekday mornings between 4 and 7!
